Homeschooling Through the Hormone Hurricane: Middle Schoolers, Mood Swings, and the Magic of “We Don’t Care”

Let’s Be Real: Middle School Is Already a Wild Ride

Homeschooling middle school is not for the faint of heart. Between growth spurts, emotional whiplash, and the “new” version of your kid who woke up this morning suddenly too cool for phonics, it’s a whole job. Now imagine doing all that while you’re riding the hot, unpredictable wave of perimenopause. Y’all. I’m not saying we deserve medals, but give us a trophy shelf at least.

Wait…Is It Me or My Hormones?

If you’ve been homeschooling for a while, you probably know how to spot the signs of burnout: constant fatigue, lack of motivation, crying over your printer jamming (again). But what if those same symptoms aren’t just burnout? What if they’re hormones knocking at the door like, “Surprise! It’s me—Perimenopause.”

Here are a few signs you might be navigating that stage while also being the headmistress of your homeschool:

• Sleepless nights…even though you’re exhausted.
• Mood swings that feel like a bad tween novel.
• Crying at the drop of a pencil (or because you actually dropped a pencil).
• Forgetting where you put your glasses (while they’re on your head), sipping cold coffee at 2pm, and wondering why you walked into the pantry.

Perimenopause + Middle School = Emotional Gymnastics

Let me paint you a picture: Your middle schooler is having thoughts. Big ones. About the world. About themselves. About why math is pointless and how they should never have to write another paragraph again. Meanwhile, you’re sweating through your third shirt and questioning why you picked any of this year’s curriculum.

At least once a week, I look at our lesson plans and want to toss them in the trash like a salad I knew we weren’t gonna eat.

Cue the “We Don’t Care” Movement

You know what saved me? An Instagram mama @justbeingmelani who boldly started the “We Don’t Care” movement. If you don’t know who she is RUN to her IG!!! The idea is simple and liberating: we’re doing our best and that’s enough. The house isn’t perfect, the lesson didn’t go as planned, the tears fell (mine and his)…and you know what? We don’t care.

Say it loud for the sweaty moms in the back:
We. Don’t. Care.

It’s permission to be human. To stop trying to be the Pinterest-perfect homeschooler when you’re just trying to survive another round of hormone-fueled highs and lows while your kid discovers sarcasm as a second language

How to Manage Perimenopause While Homeschooling (Without Losing Your Mind)

Here’s the good news you’re not alone, and you can manage this. Here’s how:

1. Check Your Hormones, Sis.. Before you switch curriculums again or rework your entire homeschool plan for the millionth time, check in with your doctor. A blood panel might tell you that what you thought was just burnout is actually a hormonal shift.

2. Create Buffer Days… Build “light days” into your homeschool week less academic pressure, more connection. This isn’t slacking off. It’s smart homeschooling that respects the energy of both teacher and student.

3. Find Your Homeschool People…Surround yourself with mamas who keep it real. You need at least one friend who’ll laugh with you when you’re crying over missing highlighters and who’ll text back “you’re not crazy, this is just hormones and middle school.” or when you having a moment they recognize the moment and listen don’t judge. For all my natural mamas’s I am 100% on board for the natural treatment methods. Just need to get those horomones checked.

4. Eat. Sleep. Move. Repeat.… Basic, I know. But blood sugar crashes, sleep deprivation, and zero movement make hormonal symptoms worse. Drink water like it’s your job. Stretch. Step outside. Take a walk without the kids. Eat the dang salad (unless you’re still mad about that one you threw away).

5. Talk to Your Kids (Yes, Even Your Tween) ….Explain age appropriately what you’re going through. It models self-awareness and gives them permission to speak up about their changing emotions too. Who knew homeschool could be group therapy?

6. Learn Your Triggers…I have been working on how I respond to people. Keeping my cool and not stepping all the way out character. So far I have been doing really well staying calm. Because baby I be ready to let it rip when I am having a moment.

When You See a Fellow Mama Spiraling…

Say something. Gently. With love. Send a text like,
“Hey, are you okay? Or are you on your third coffee and crying over cursive like I was last week?”

Drop off a smoothie. Send a meme. Better yet, offer to co-op one afternoon and give her a break. Because sometimes we need someone else to recognize we’re on the hormone rollercoaster before we do.

Middle School Homeschoolers Don’t Help…But They’re Not the Enemy

Let’s not forget these little hormonal humans we’re raising are going through it too. One minute they’re laughing at fart jokes, the next they’re contemplating the meaning of life at 9:15 AM on a Tuesday while refusing to read the next chapter of their novel study.

They’re pulling away and needing us all at once. They’re learning to think critically, argue everything, and feel deeply about things like snack options. It’s a mess. But it’s also kind of beautiful, if we pause to see it.

Final Thoughts: We’re in This Together

Homeschooling through perimenopause isn’t a joke but laughing about it might save your sanity.

So the next time you’re mid-meltdown with a crying tween, a cold coffee in one hand and a broken dry-erase marker in the other, just remember:

You’re not crazy. You’re perimenopausal.

You’re not failing. You’re homeschooling.

And most of all…

We. Don’t. Care.

We care deeply about our kids. But we don’t care to be perfect. That’s not the assignment.